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Horses have unfounded fears and sudden over-reactions because they have highly developed senses. Luckily, when Zum overcomes his fear with one object, he more easily overcomes his fear of the next object. When he actively resists me by pulling away or bolting, he is beyond his ability to cope. I ease up and go back to Zum’s tolerance level. I know Zum is relaxed when he lowers his head and neck, rests a hind leg, looks at me with soft eyes, relaxes his ears, exhales through his nostrils or moves his tongue, chews and licks his lips. Once Zum relaxes, I reward him with a break, a rub and a kind word.

I give Zum all the time he needs to learn a lesson. If he refuses to learn, I try not to fight with him. I never create a crisis and I never yell at Zum. If Zum gets upset at a lesson, I practice something important that he likes. Right now, Zum refuses the bridle and the bit. So I am using the hackamore. This has no bit so he accepts this without a fight. I am not in a hurry. I know he will accept the bridle at some point in the future. I want Zum to be calm and confident that I am fun and safe to be around. I want Zum to trust me and my leadership. My corrections are smooth. Establishing genuine affection between us is the major lesson we both need to learn!

I know that horses don’t aggressively bite people they like. I want Zum to like me. I actually want Zum to love me. My long term goal is that Zum and I learn to trust and love each other for life. When Zum is getting out of control, I change back to doing something controlled to calm him down and improve his mood. There is no point in either one of us being unhappy or upset. Zum is a mirror image of me and my emotions. If I want Zum to be confident and obedient, I have to show him my confidence and teach him how to be in control. I always pet Zum frequently, stopping and resting often when he does well.

When I ask Zum to do something and he refuses, I ask for something else. Right now, Zum doesn’t want to open his mouth. He refuses the bit and the bridle. This is frustrating to me but I don’t take it personally. I don’t resent him or threaten him. I leave Zum alone for a moment and then I ask him to do something else. I never hold a grudge against Zum. I have made up my mind not to scold Zum. I give him leading lessons to get control of his hips. I ask him to do something he likes to do. I try to maintain control even if I am frustrated inside. Instead of saying ‘don’t do this,’ I am training Zum using ‘do this’ and ‘now do that.’ Zum is my life partner and I am not in a hurry. I am giving him all the time he needs to learn a lesson.

 

A mouthy horse needs lots of attention. He needs all the love and attention that he wants. Zum likes to put his nose into my space. So I handle his head and mouth. I hug his head, rub his head and give his head lots of good petting so he doesn’t demand attention from me. To discourage biting, I hold Zum’s nose gently between my hands and rub it both softly and vigorously. He gets tired of having his nose rubbed and he wants to take it away. I also give him a job. I ask him to move to the right and then to the left. If Zum thinks that every time he noses me around, he has to move his feet then he stops nosing me. I never ignore Zum. The last thing a horse wants to feel is: ‘Go away. Nobody likes you. Nobody wants to be around you.’ Horses are social and they need social contact. Zum needs more love and attention, not less.

When my mother was 30 years old, she played first violin with the Santa Fe Orchestra. A friend that also played in the Orchestra told her about a tall, handsome, single man that lived in California. My mother was also told that this Californian believed in communal living on his land and he loved lots of animals, fruit trees and gardens. She started to write letters with this man who was named Ken. They wrote letters back and forth for six months until Ken decided to drive to Santa Fe to meet my mother. They arranged to meet on the steps of the Santa Fe Public Library. They met and it was love at first sight. They married soon afterwards. Ken is my father. Yesterday, I went to the Indian Market in Santa Fe wearing one of my mother’s favorite dresses. It is appropriate that I have a photo standing on the steps where my parents met and fell in love.

To me, love is caring for the one you love. I love Zum and all my animals. I spend many hours each day caring for them. I feed them the best hay I can find, I make sure they all have fresh, clean water. I clean all their pens and corrals daily. I love taking care of my animals. I love knowing that they have everything that they need and that they are happy in my care. I once overheard my mother telling my horse Kamar: ‘You are so lucky that Tanya is your mistress.’ My mother also told me that I need to find a husband that loves me as much as I love my animals. My mother cared for me more than anyone.

I have seen horse trainers that jerk on a horse’s lead rope and yell ‘Quit.’ I have seen horse trainers that take a swing at a horse as they yell at him. I have also seen horse trainers that whip horses and even punch horses in the chest. This doesn’t tell the horse anything meaningful. It only teaches the horse to hate people. I want to teach Zum that he can trust me. The loving emotional bond that Zum and I are building together daily is just as important as the lessons I teach him with the lungeline.

I ask Zum to go forward and before he gets too excited, I take the slack out of the lungeline, putting tension on it and I ask Zum to stop. I wait for Zum’s feet to slow down and then stop. There is a difference between a relax and a stop. Once his nose is turned towards me, his neck muscles relax and Zum stops, I release pressure on the lungeline. This lets Zum know that he did what I wanted. I give him a moment to stand and then I ask him to move forward again. I keep him moving and then I ask him to stop again. This teaches Zum to calm down.

If I allow Zum to buck around on the lungeline, I am training him to buck around and get out-of-control. Letting Zum go crazy on the lungeline could lead to leg injuries. Zum has lots of energy so I need to put it to good use. I ask Zum for lots of direction changes. Energy is valuable! I use Zum’s energy to train him to develop control.